Friday, September 12, 2008

Who's The Meanest Mom Ever?

Did you guys know that girls equal drama? Well, they do, especially in my house. Take Keri for instance. You all know her signature quote, “It hurts really bad Mom”. Which is used for any injuries real or imagined. You also know that I implemented my brilliant plan, Operation: Make Slaves Out of My Children. This operation seems to be successful thus far. With that being said there are still things that I myself must do.

After all, I can’t have them washing my work clothes. I don’t want their grubby little paws anywhere near clothes that I wear to work. Mainly because everything I own must last for EXTREMELY long periods. I should get a good five years out of a pair of slacks. So I was puttering around the house a couple of nights ago, doing things that only I can do. As I performing these various tasks, I notice that Keri has several messes in her bedroom and bathroom. It briefly crossed my mind to clean it up, then I remembered. There is a new world order in this house. I implemented Operation MSOOMC to PREVENT me from having to do everything.

In a calm and reasonable voice I told Keri everything that I saw that she needed to clean up, which went something like this: “Keri, you need to clean up the mess you made in the bathroom. Also I noticed that you have several clean outfits wadded up on the bed. Those need to be hung up in the closet. You also need to pick up your dishes from the computer desk and put them in the dishwasher. There are also a couple of wadded up pieces of paper on your bedroom floor, you need to clean that up too”. (The clean outfits were because she changed clothes three times before settling on an outfit)

No big deal……right? Not in my house. Keri flings herself down on the bed with her face in the mattress. She starts to cry. After a few minutes of ignoring her, I get a little frustrated and ask her what the problem is. Her response was, “I just feel like you gave me so much to do that I don’t even know where to start”, as she boo-hoos some more. Are you kidding me? Now I am a LITTLE upset. I tell her, “Keri, how do you think I feel when I have to come home, cook dinner, wash dishes, sweep and mop, and do laundry everyday? You don’t think I feel like I have too much to do?” Oh the drama! You would have thought I told the kid she had to clean the entire house by herself. I only asked her to clean up the messes that SHE made!!!

She pouted for a few more minutes, and I was forced to use my stern mother voice. I told her that she could pout all she wanted to, but she WAS going to do her share and she WAS going to clean up the messes that SHE made. Aren’t I so mean? Aren’t I just a horrible mother? My blackened heart should be ripped out, baked in the sun and then tied around her neck. I don’t even know how I live with myself.


harassedmomsramblings said...

LOL this is definately a girl thing - I can SEE Kiara doing this!

But WELL DONE for being tough ;o)

Merrie said...

It amazes me the amount of time they spend crying about things they don't want to do. I've tried explaining to my kids that if they'd just gone and done what I asked instead of cried, they'd be done by now. I think this actually makes them cry more, though. Perhaps it would have a better effect on your older kids.

I still say you're doing the RIGHT thing. :)

Mental P Mama said...

Oh my! I thought I had that title. Phew. I feel so much better knowing how horrible you are;)

Astarte said...

OMG, Josie does that crap all the time. Lately, she's even been crying over *perceived* things she *might* have to do. Gawd, it's obnoxious!!!!

HW said...

Something that worked for me when our daughter was that age was to actually make a list. I even wrote each item in a different color - cause what ten-year-old girl doesn't like magic markers? I think it helped her to keep focused and see progress.

Last week, when I told my daughter she could not go to our rival school's homecoming dance, this was her response:

We are in for a long four years.

creative kerfuffle said...

holy crap i could have written this post and just changed the names. the girl and boy are EXACTLY like this. if we didn't have kids the house would be frickn' spotless and you know what? i think i'm beginning to understand why people are so happy when their kids finally move the hell out.

Karen Deborah said...

Mine complain that is all I ever say to them. I on the other hand do not understand why any human would leave a used Q tip on a bathroom sink. I also have kids who put clean clothes in piles of cahning my mind don't know what to wear. They do their laundry I do mine. On the other hand in some ways I am cleaning more and they are doing less but eveything that comes out of mouth is not a complaint at the pigsties. We are an authority you know, on filthy pigsties.

Insane Mama said...

Oh yea, I'm the big meanie at my house and I am sticking with it!

E said...

slow through your nose and out through your mouth...and hot baths...this is how we survive.
Okay and maybe a little really good dark chocolate

Merrie said...

Hey, where are you, lady? Hope everything's okay. Thinkin' about chya. :)