Thursday, January 29, 2009

My Whine (Wine) Session

I would like to start off by saying that I am a healthy person. I have never had the flu. I don’t get colds, stomach bugs, viruses or any other sort of ailments. I had my appendix out when I was 12. That was the most traumatic medical event in my life. I am blessed with a fantastic immune system. Germs don’t stand a chance in this body. I’m a mean, lean, germ resistin’ machine. The last time I was REALLY sick was almost five years ago when I got a bad case of strep throat.

Until THIS WEEK. This week, I have the worst cold I have ever had in my life. I went home early from work yesterday. I am sick during the week that 100 people will be laid off at my job. I couldn’t be sick last week when it didn’t matter if I was here or not. NNOOOOO, not me. I have to be sick THIS WEEK. Remember that lady that was blowing her nose at the minute clinic? The one that I said had bad manners? The one that I said should go to the bathroom to blow her nose? I have changed my mind. I finally gave up going to the bathroom every five minutes to blow my nose. It just wasn’t working out for me. I think people should blow their noses ANY PLACE they want. Karma people, karma. That’s exactly what I get for giving her such a hard time.

I went to the drugstore today during my lunch hour to stock up on tissue. I had to replace the ENTIRE box that I used in the office. I got a box to keep on my desk and a small package to carry in my purse cuz DANG!!!!! My nose is running like a water faucet. I had to blow my nose in the middle of the drugstore. Humiliation is my name, degradation is my game. Yes I LOVE to have my body leaking fluids and not have any control over it what-so-ever. I had no idea a cold could be so miserable.

The downside of having a fabulous immune system is that when some cold or virus manages to sneak in, it’s a doozy. I’m talking about stuffy, feverish, hacking up a lung sick. Not just a nice delicate sneeze here and there. Thank you dear readers for allowing me this time to whine. I don’t have a husband to whine to, so I hope you guys don’t mind. I think I need a nice, hot toddy. I’m not sure what’s in one, but it sounds good. I’m sure there is some kind of alcohol involved……….


Astarte said...

Oh, you poor thing!!!! Stress + lady with the booger snots = sick You!!!

It's probably better that you're sick this week. I mean, after all, you would be miserable anyway.

Karen Deborah said...

I had that mother of all colds too, it was a major bummer. I have since bought a Neti-pot. It is a little pot that you mix up fresh warm saline in and then literally wash out your sinuses. It does NOT hurt. It does CLEAN you out and makes you feel much better. It's a mental thing getting over the idea of sticking a teapot spicket up to the side of each nostril and pouring fluid into them. What comes OUT ain't purty either. You can buy them at any Walmart, Walgreens etc,..and this is much more effective than a saline spray.
AFTER washing this junk out of your head take some thera flu, and get some hand wipes. The folks at work will appreciate it.
If you get green gunky and fever above 101 go to the doc for antibiotics.

HW said...

Don't know how to say this but having a husband wouldn't help. I whine to mine all the time when I'm sick and he just steps over my near dead carcus and goes on about his day.

I think a hot toddy is something like rum and honey served hot. But rum and rum would probably work too.

I'm just sayin'.....

Sure hope you feel better soon.